Scenes

I recently read an article by Emma Spectre where she watched How to lose a guy in 10 days and wrote down everything that she thought while watching the classic rom-com. It’s a great article. Like any journalist worth their salt, I am going to copy this idea. I’ve wanted to do it for a while, but i was waiting until I have watched a film that I loved. That day finally came. 

So, here is mine. Only instead of the Mathhew McConaughey and Kate Hudson masterclass, it’s Disney’s Wreck It Ralph. One of my favorite films growing up. A random choice I know. So for those 5 Wreck it Ralph fans out there, this is for you.

1. Steamboat Willy being adapted into an 8-bit version is the perfect start to establish the love that was put into creating this film.

2. Ralph’s life is not great, but can you blame him? Not only does he get chucked off a roof for his job, but everyone hates him. I don’t know why the nice-landers have such beef with him. Not to go full cinemasins, but I’m pretty sure they are aware it’s a game. Are they just full-blown Jared Leto method actors? One can only assume.

3. Like most people who turn 30, Ralph spends his big day having a midlife crisis in therapy with other bad guys. He raises red flags to the group due to his wanting to be seen as the good guy, but the bad guys worry he is going ‘full turbo’. I also can’t help but smile like a child when I see Bowser, Dr Eggman and the Pac-Man ghost all in the same room.

4. The attention to detail is fantastic. The tube extension leads all the arcade games, it’s like a big train station or, as they call it, ‘Game Central Station’. That’s brilliant. You can feel the love that was put into the film.

5. Sonic is very underutilised in this film. Live, laugh, love Sonic.

6. Fix it Felix is spending the 30th anniversary of the game with a big party. Ralph being excluded is the Pac-Man cherry on top of what has been a crappy day all around. I’d be gutted as well. Felix was hitting some killer dance moves. Someone remind me to hit those moves next time I’m at the club.

7. Ralph may not be a good guy, but he is a great guilt tripper. He gets himself into the party and finds himself butting heads with nice-lander Gene. Gene is a loser. His excuse for ostracising Ralph is that he doesn’t have a medal. Which is rich considering the only one who earns a medal is Felix and not him. I don’t see Gene living in a pile of bricks. I hate Gene.

8. Seeing different characters in different games’ aesthetics is, once again, so fun. Seeing Bowser in Pac-Man and Ralph in Tapper is such a joy.

9. You can boil down this whole film to Gene being a massive inconvenience. Ralph calls his bluff and goes to find a medal in the first-person shooter Hero’s Duty, home of Sergeant Calhoun. We further get an insight into how these characters approach being in their games. They are basically actors. Similar to the ones at Disney Land, but instead of earning a wage, they do it so they don’t get unplugged.

10. This may be the only film in which it gets away with such clear exposition drops. It would come off as obnoxious, but it makes perfect sense. Calhoun can tell us how these killer bugs work, which Ralph brings into Sugar Crush because she is telling the person playing the game.

11. While Ralph is dicking about in Hero’s Duty, he has left his game. Gene tells another nicelander to stick to the program, which further shows he is just an arsehole to Ralph for no apparent reason.

12. Ralph has landed in Sugar Crush, and his medal is stolen by Vanellope von Schweetz. She’s bratty, a pain in the arse and a pro at pushing buttons. She wants the medal so she can race in Sugar Crush, in which she has been alienated due to her being a glitch. Thus starts one of the greatest Disney duos.

13. Many moments make me laugh throughout this film, but the moments with Felix and Calhoun always tickle me. His wide-eyed positivity next to her no-nonsense attitude makes for some great laughs.

14. Calhoun’s backstory is so unnecessarily tragic. Surely the game could have toned it down a little.

15. Felix gets pegged by Calhoun. No further questions at this time.

16. There is nothing more devastating than when the Sugar Crush racers destroy Vanellope’s car. A piece of me always dies when it happens. 

17. I may be 21 years old, but I’ll never turn my nose up at a doodie joke. Hero’s doodie? Come on, that’s good stuff.

18. The puns throughout the time at Sugar Crush are fantastic. Personal favourites being Nesquick sand, actually being quick sand, Laffy Taffy, actually being laughy taffy, and King Candy saying he just glazed me instead of grazed. Once again, that’s good stuff.

19. A personal favourite of the wacky hygienic in this film is Vanellope and Ralph creating her car through a mini game. It blows my mind how tasteless The Emoji Movie did these same things. The blueprint is literally right here.

20. No matter what game they are in, I like how the code remains the same. Sure, their personality may differ, but Felix will always fix things, Ralph, even when intending to be good, will wreck things, and despite having no experience, Vanellope is an excellent driver. There’s no better way to show Vanellope being such than a montage with Rihanna’s Shut Up and Drive.

21. Felix falls madly in love with Calhoun and calls her a dynamite gal. Calhoun freaks out and kicks Felix off the ship. Not because it’s a horrible line, although it is, but because her husband used to call her the same. The valid crash-out leads to kicking Felix off the ship, and her going to find the bugs. She does and finds a whole colony living under the sugary floor, and Felix lands himself in prison. Or as King Candy calls it, a fungeon. See, good puns.

22. Word to Smash Mouth, Ralph isn’t the sharpest tool in the shed. However, King Candy’s manipulation to convince him that Vanellope shouldn’t drive makes total sense. It would have undercut the following moment if he switched sides just because he is a bit dim.

23. Speaking of, not many scenes break my heart more than Ralph breaking Vanellope’s car that they made together. The grimace on his face, the cries from Vanellope, it’s gut-wrenching.  Especially after she gives him her own medal, saying, ‘You’re my hero. ’ 

24. Ralph finally gets his medal, but at what cost? He’s ruined his friendship and everyone in his game has gone awol. Even worse, the only one left when he gets back to his game is Gene. I still hate that guy.

25. After a convenient throw of the medal at the glass to the real world, Ralph realises that Vanellope is actually the main character of Sugar Crush and not King Candy. With no time to waste, Ralph breaks Felix out of prison and makes it up to Vanellope by fixing her car. The race of a lifetime is upon us. Stakes could not be higher.

26. It kind of begs the question: if Ralph somehow broke the glass when he threw the medal, could he not just jump out into the real world? What’s the logic behind that? Is it not that deep? Yeah, fair.

27. There it is. King Candy is the game’s runaway Turbo. Disney finally did a twist villain well. Never thought I’d see the day. It’s a great reveal. 

28. “I am bad, and that’s good. I’ll never be good, and that’s not bad. There’s no one I’d rather be than me”. Enough said. So what a perfect climax. 

29. Vanellope saves Ralph from exploding in Coke and Mentos thanks to her glitchiness. She crosses the finish line, and everything is normal. No more killer bugs. No more Turbo. 
31. Who doesn’t love a happy ending? Fix it, Felix is saved, everyone appreciates Ralph, and things are back to normal. He gets to see Vanellope bossing it every time he’s chucked off the roof. The credits roll to Owl City’s Good Time which pulls the film to a close. I’m glad Disney left it untouched. Even they knew it didn’t need a sequel, which destroys everything good in this one. Right? Guys?